"What are you scared of?" "Regretting."

I have him. Somewhat.

I once believed that staying firm to certain morals made up a large part of the person I was, am. That I should never have to change these principals for anything, more importantly, anyone.

It scares me that he's changing these principals. I can't say whether I'm improving because of him or falling. Sliding downwards on a slippery slope. I'm losing direction, something that's fundamental. It may not be directly because of him. But he is contributing. The saddest part of this is...

I have not yet ascertained whether
he loves me
or not

I know there's someone else already engraved in his heart.
I know there's another yet, that he would give one half of his bed to.

Why do I do this to myself?

I want to be needed. That was the goal. But in reverse, I'm the one who needs him, now.

Where is this path heading? Oh, how far I've strayed.

"Pick a nice one."

How ironic, when he'll never pick me.

"Don't cry because it's over, smile because it happened."
-Dr. Suess
-at the opening ceremonies speech & restated by an editor in chief

I only hope I can take it so lightheartedly.
Who am I to him? Who is he to me?

I hate the fact that I'll probably always be the one who likes him more than he likes me.
I want someone who will love me more than themselves.
Impossible? Perhaps.
For him to?
Impossible? Most definitively.

"Let's run away."

When I saw it, it was classically my style. But I hesitated, eventually going back for it. Now. Well, there's actually many ways to interpret it. "From each other", could be something to add on. You just never know.

Never had a fling? Well, I think you're currently having two. We both know it won't be happily ever. I feel like you can accept this while I'm still deluding myself.

There's still time to win this game. I just can't get attached.